A recurrent theme

I keep saying this, but it bears repeating (maybe). My life is completely transformed since my illness. I spend my time now more or less doing what I want to do; I'm not governed by the need to do the best for my employer or that famous Protestant work ethic, if the sun's shining, or if I fancy a day away from work, I take time out. True, it's sometimes worrying, wondering whether I'll be able to pay the bills. So far, something's always turned up, though, and I've been fine. At the moment, I have the axe of potential redundancy above my head, and that is alarming, but I'm refusing to worry too much about this. Something will turn up to replace that work, if I really am redundant in a month's time.

This is one of those "I wish I'd known then what I know now" reflections. I spent more than a decade working in a job that could have been really enjoyable but that was constrained by the organisation. I was hugely stressed all the time I worked at that job. Why did I stay? I thought I wouldn't be able to survive on my own. It took a series of "unfortunate events" to lead me to the conclusion that if the cancer didn't get me, the stress of being at the mercy of a big organisation would. So, I left. I really wish that I'd made that decision years earlier. What a shame it took a crisis to help me take that step into the unknown. Money may be tight now, but I've never been happier.

Today's reflection? Don't wait until it's too late to make a difference.