Memories...

A year ago today, I had the procedure that resulted in the diagnosis of my cancer. I had the choice of a general or a local anaesthetic - I chose the local. Indeed, I insisted on the local option and I was lucky that there was a surgeon at my hospital who was prepared to do a hysteroscopy under local anaesthetic.

I don't remember much about the procedure; I recall being asked if I'd like to watch it on the TV screen in the theatre and refusing! It turned out that the TV screen wasn't working in any case, which made the surgeon's job harder. What should have been a 10 minute procedure turned into half an hour - and I began to wonder what on earth was going on. The consultant was called in to assist, not because of the findings but because of the lack of a TV screen view. He and the young woman surgeon huddled in a corner, muttering for some time, while I was sent off to get dressed and to wait to talk to the consultant.

My memories of that consultation, unlike my recollection of the events in theatre, are very clear. The consultant thought I had a necrotic fibroid. During our conversation, he said, on separate occasions, "I don't think it's cancer", "I'd be surprised if it were cancer", "It doesn't look like cancer to me."

What a shame I didn't get that in writing from him. The ensuing legal case would, at least, have taken my mind off what followed!

I admit now that I was surprised that he didn't think I had cancer. By that time, I was convinced that I had. I was also suspicious about why he sent a note to pathology asking for the results of the investigation to be sent to my gynaecologist "within the week". His request to his nurse to make an appointment at the gynaecologist's clinic for me "as a matter of urgency" was also something of a giveaway! On the other hand, since it was so close to Christmas, it may have been true, as he said, that he wanted my mind to be put at rest before the holiday.. .

So, the moral of that tale, I think, is to go with your gut feeling; and don't believe what you're told until the results are back from the lab...