Cramp!

A long walk yesterday relieved some of the symptoms of painful legs, but they were still aching a little when I got home, as though cramp was waiting to strike. Paracetemol before sleeping settled that, but the pain did wake me up again in the early hours of the morning and, when I got up, I finally identified it as the sort of tightness that happens just before a muscle cramps up. Indeed, prodding my legs revealed that the muscles were all very 'tight' and painful to the touch, while my hip joints continued their arthritic-like aching. Even feeding the dogs was an effort, since it was difficult to put their food bowls on the floor - my legs felt as though they were likely to go into a spasm of very painful cramp every time I bent my knees or leaned forward.

Of course, the danger of having radiotherapy and being warned about possible side effects is that you think every tiny twinge must be related to the treatment. Since medical opinion appears to be divided on whether my aching legs are therapy-related, it is possible that the pain I'm experiencing at present is coincidental. On the other hand, as I've said before, I do know other people who've had this same reaction to pelvic radiation.

Walking does help, so the walking poles are coming out this morning, and I'm off for another hike around the village. If the Roman camp is open today, I may even go there to have a look around. It's too early in the year for swallows to have arrived, but it's a pleasant site with lovely views, and it's always helpful to think of things other than, "Where will I have to park tomorrow when I go to the hospital..."

I'm finding that making sure I have a lot to occupy my mind is really important at present. Whenever I'm not busy, it seems that I start to brood on whether the cancer could have been found sooner, if it had been, would I have needed radiotherapy and so on. These thoughts are not helpful, but talking to others in the hospital waiting room has revealed that we all have them. I believe that the key to a quick recovery is to stay positive; brooding does not add to a sense of well-being. So, whenever I feel a bout of self-pity coming on, I grab my knitting, go for a walk, do some gardening - and pray that I won't turn into one of those irritating Pollyanna types who sees the good in everything!